Interview Questions for Brenda Dater, Author of Parenting without Panic

• You talk about the need to view behavior through an Asperger’s Lens.  What does that mean and why is it important?
  
• You have an 18-year-old son with Asperger’s and you write a lot about him in the book.  What role did he play in deciding which stories to tell and how to tell them?
  
• In the book you talk about “throwing away the yardstick” and recognizing that your child’s developmental path will be different from typically developing kids.  Why do you think that’s so hard?
  
• Professionals and parents often describe children on the autism spectrum as high or low functioning.  Do you think these labels are useful?
  
• How do parents know when it’s time to talk with their child about a diagnosis?  How should they do it?  When and how should they tell other family members or friends?
  
• You talk about the fact that parents only have a limited amount of time, money and energy and that many parents feel unsure about how to focus their resources to help their child.  What do you suggest to help them decide?
  
• The stories you include in the book highlight the challenges many kids face, explain why they exist and offer practical suggestions parents can try at home.  Can you give a few examples of some of your favorite strategies and approaches?
  
• I’d love to hear a success story about one of your kids.  Do you have one or two that they’d let you share?
  
• Why are some glitches good?  How do they help foster resilience and independence?
  
• How can special interests lower the anxiety or stress in children on the autism spectrum?  
  
• You talk about the need for infrastructure maintenance in the family.  How do you encourage parents to take care of themselves so that they can better care for their children? 
  
• I love your story about wanting your husband to be just like you and then changing your mind after you thought about it more.  Can you talk about that?
  
• What’s your favorite story in the book and why?
  
• Some of your most heart wrenching stories are in the friendship chapter.  You talk about exclusion and bullying and also how challenging it is to understand the unwritten rules of social relationships.  You also offer a lot of solid practical advice.  What was that like for your son and you to go through those experiences?  And if he’s ok with you talking about this—is he more connected to friends now?
  
• What’s your hope for parents and families?